I’ve often considered myself to be quite self-aware although I’ve developed a greater appreciation for and honesty with really understanding myself over the past 7 years. There’s nothing like personal and professional challenges colliding to create uncertainty and a sense of inadequacy to provoke a much needed regenerative look at yourself and the impact you can have on the situations around you. This latter part can often be overlooked, yet it is critical for leaders to go this extra step so that they learn and adapt, creating better experiences for not only those around them but for themselves as well.

 

“He who knows others is wise.  He who knows himself is enlightened.”

– Lao Tzu

 

Self-Awareness

Most of us can easily relate to the concept of knowing oneself; values, passions, aspirations, and triggers. The thing is these change throughout the different stages of life and there is a leadership study cited in HBR that suggests even though most people believe they are self-aware, only 10-15% of people truly are based on the study’s criteria. For example, I did not realize and fully accept how I default to judgment as a coping mechanism when the world around me gets rocky; when my values are challenged by others who have different values. While this is a rather unflattering truth to admit and share about myself, I have been open to accepting this. And my new found self-awareness has helped me to intercept the judgment of self, others, and circumstance that creeps in and for this, I am a better person – with better relationships.

 

Situational Self-Awareness

I only learned about this concept a few leadership roles back in my timeline when I became certified in what was then called the Korn Ferry Assessment for Leadership Potential (it has since been re-named).  At first, I nodded my head because I knew about situational awareness. But then I learned that this was different and more meaningful than simply being aware of my surroundings and reading the room. This is the much required partner to self-awareness because without it, we don’t truly learn and adapt our behaviours. Situational self-awareness is understanding the impact that my values, beliefs, and behaviours have on other people. Oh yah, the things I know and do impact others – novel concept; often overlooked.  It’s the impact on others that has really motivated me to learn more about myself and to be fully present to how I show up and how I may impact those around me. For example, talking too much and droning on causes people to tune out. This certainly isn’t helpful when you’re trying to engage, influence, or inspire others.

 

I’ve come to think of self-awareness as continuous ‘research’, something that tends to reveal new findings over time; situational self-awareness is that practice of connecting who I am with how I show-up and the impact that has on others. It’s the art of integrating knowing, being, doing, and impacting with truly positive intentions.


– Melissa Law