Early in my career I worked with a senior leader who shared a story that has resonated with me over the decades, one that I have shared with other leaders time and time again. One particularly busy day, a member of his team tentatively knocked on his door to ask if it was okay to speak with him. He was a bit shocked by the approach because – and I will attest to this – he was a warm and open leader who truly upheld the concept of “open door policy”. The team member thanked him for his time and promised to keep it quick. Sensing something was off, he asked if there was anything worrying the team member. She assured him she was fine and that she simply did not want to add any stress to his day. Surprised by this, he inquired about the reasoning for thinking he was stressed. She replied that earlier when he was walking in the hall, he looked rather upset, deep in thought, and that it might not be a good day to bother him. He remembered the moment she was referring to and apologized for giving the wrong impression. Nothing was amiss, all was fine, and he was his usual friendly, approachable self. During that moment in the hall, he had been thinking about the errands he needed to run between leaving work and heading home. Apparently it was quite the dilemma because he looked upset. That’s it, that’s all.
“The great leaders have always stage-managed their effects.”
– Charles De Gaulle
Might seem silly to some, but to me it is a simple reminder that the higher you climb on your leadership journey, the larger the audience grows. When there’s a sold out show of onlookers, there is no room for misinterpretation. I’m not saying that leaders cannot make a mistake or have a bad day, not at all, we’re all human. What I am sharing is that our body language, words, and behaviours are on display as much as those presented by an actor or actress in a broadway show, left to the interpretation and assumption of those watching. The people you lead in a team, function, or organization are watching, and quite frankly perception trumps intention every time.
A few years back, I was speaking with a senior leader who was frustrated that people were not connecting with his good intentions. They were good indeed, the problem was how he went about his day-to-day created perceptions that were quite the contrary. People were uncertain and became distrusting of him because of his choice of words, body language, and behaviours. I’m not suggesting that leaders should put on an act or persona, as if they were in a broadway play, that wouldn’t serve anyone all that well. What I am suggesting is that as leaders, we must be mindful of how we show-up in times of success and times of duress. Followers look to leaders for consistency, clarity, and confidence. This is the role we have auditioned for, leader. Be the leader you want to be, everyday and every moment.
– Melissa Law
